Duke Nukem Forever… what it could have been.

Stop fucking complaining… about regenerating health, weapon limits, no mighty foot. You still get to visit strip joints, crack one liners and piss in toilets. The humour was what made Duke 3D so memorable, not those mid nineties FPS conventions that were in every game. Enjoy DNF for what it is.

What are you waiting for? Christmas?

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    36 Responses ttto Duke Nukem Forever… what it could have been.

    1. burritos says:

      It really is horrible. Just awful.

      If it came out in 2000 it would be ok. 2005, crapware. 2011. I don’t know man. It is what it is … a complete and utter waste.

      I think your 1998 comment is spot on. If it had come out in 1998 as it did today, it would be the most epic jaw-dropping game of all time.

      But, um, it didn’t.

    2. casemodsisahomo says:

      Shitty game is shitty, fanboy.

    3. Belbo says:

      I remember DNF when it was a sidescrolling commander keen adventure. BLOOD 4 eva

    4. Destrucctaur says:

      I haven’t played DNF yet, but everything else aside, I doubt the old Duke Nukem style translates well into 2011. Duke was such a post-80s thing and 1998 would’ve been the last appropriate time. Nowadays, nobody buys such hyper-badassery anymore; all characters today need to have a tragic past and less firepower, more weltschmertz.

    5. anadin says:

      Great game.
      True to its roots.
      Well made, polished, stable, attractive, gripping, challenging and full of suprises.

      Problem is all the hype.

      I enjoy it. Thats all I care about.

    6. Dreth says:

      I read so many harsh reviews that I was disappointed, since I was waiting to pirate it.

      In a few months I might feel differently.

    7. Duke Neker says:

      shut up, duke 3d had basically no humor, just a bunch, a couple actually, of punchlines stolen from movies. The game was great for its gameplay and level design. Forever doesn’t try to improve the old formula, it rejects it completely for a stupid slow corridor experience.

    8. red7paulbrennan says:

      Hey wondering why nobody is talking about Zero Hour. I played it first then 3d, i thought 3d sucked but Zero Hour was great. Forever looks like a good rental probably pick it up this weekend.

    9. juanpastation says:

      hail to the king, bitch!!!
      duke is awesome and it was worth the wait. it’s not the same, yet it’s not different. that’s good.

      • Death_to_Dude says:

        Guess again, freakshow. I’m coming back to town, and the last thing that’s gonna go through your mind before you die… is my size- 13 boot!

    10. Death_to_Dude says:

      Get back to work, you slacker!

    11. dre says:

      fail to the king baby. seriously, very disappointed. game is WAAY too short, half the levels are boring shit puzzle crap you have to do. NO JETPACK. WTF??
      yeah the graphics are ok, but the gameplay wasn’t that great to be honest. the “jokes” as some call it are on a level of a mentally handicapped 12 year old. can’t kill friendlies or strippers either. just fucking lame.

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