I paid about €10 for my pearl earrings which is more than this. They’re fake though. I love them so very very much. This is one of the few good things about this generation, girls getting ridiculously excited over plastic jewellery, unlike the women back in the day who insisted on gold and silver. No seriously, I put those earrings on and I can do fucking anything, it’s practically instant magnificence. It’s hard to describe in a logical manner to plastic heathens, but to attach beautiful plastic to ears, knowing that only very few people who have a clue can tell that they’re not real and only if they get close enough, is absolutely magical.

Oh. Well ok. I had a feeling that something was suspicious about this.

EVERYTHING I SAID PRIOR TO THIS COMMENT IS STILL ABSOLUTELY VALID.