Well up north, our blonds are natural, but whatever.

What I notice most about Texans is that they seem to think that their place of residence is a discussion point. The T-shirt she’s wearing is a case in point. It’s almost like they’re walking around saying, “I’m from Texas, wanna make something of it?” and the rest of us Americans are just kind of taken aback and thinking, “Um, make WHAT of it? How is this relevant?”

I mean seriously, I’ve lived in Louisiana, and I’ve lived in Minnesota. I’m love MN and am proud to be a resident, but I don’t make a big deal about it. It’s like every resident of Texas has this complex where they think people spend their free deriding Texas and thus they have to go out of their way to defend its honor. It’s not just regionalism, as the rest of the south isn’t like this (and frankly, if you want states that are unfairly maligned, much of the south other than Texas fit the bill a lot better). It’s like the guy who has the total small-penis-overcompensation personality, but then one day you meet him in the locker room and discover he’s completely average. You just walk away from these Texans-with-a-chip-on-their-shoulder-about-it types and wonder, “what the fuck is that all about?”

Fortunately, Texas’s least favorite export, G. W. Bush, is quickly fading from memory, so hopefully Texas’s spot in our cultural consciousness will again fade back into that, “some state other than the one where I live” status, and maybe they will stop thinking they have so much to prove.