Bible Spoilers – Jesus Dies

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    Ben1605

    I am tempted to look in a Bible and say ‘HAH! YOU’RE WRONG!! IT DOESN’T HAPPEN ON 681!!!’

    LordSethD

    If I were a christians and hasd a bible… I would look on that page to see if it’s true…

    bc293

    HE DOESNT! i actually checked. in two different versions of the bible. im too lazy to actually find where he does 😀

    Alec Dalek

    He dies 4 times. Once in each of the first 4 books of the new testament (Matthew, Mark, Luke, John). They each tell the story slightly differently, but I’m sure that an all knowing, all powerful being can fix that at some point.

    mechaxl

    l2read. they tailor the story towards different groups of people.

    Caio

    Wow, Alec, I bet you think you were making an amazing point there. But you fucking failed. Three of the books give, in detail, the exact same story with only a few trifling differences. The Gospel of John says Jesus carried his own cross and the other three say it was carried for him. Wow, I guess that disproves all religion. There are plenty of places the bible contradicts itself. In fact, thousands of places. But if you really want to get that bitchy teen angstheist thing going, you’re going to have to do at least a slight amount of… Read more »

    Illuminatus

    HE DOESNT! i actually checked. in two different versions of the bible. im too lazy to actually find where he does 😀

    It must be because you haven’t the appropriate edition of the Bible certified and approved by the Lord Himself. Whichever that one is…

    MonkeyHitman

    @Illuminatus: WIN!

    blackdog33

    If you tell those in power to fuck off because GOD is your daddy then you have asked for whatever you get. JC got off light.