May 24, 2009 at 5:42 am #300740
“It’s a man’s obligation to stick his boneration in a women’s separation; this sort of penetration will increase the population of the younger generation.”
“You so much as TOUCH kitty’s ass, and I’ll put a firecracker in your nutsack and blow your balls all over your pants.”
“How ’bout we sing, ‘Kyle’s Mom is a stupid bitch’ in D Minor.”
“Hippies.They’re everywhere. They wanna save the earth, but all they do is smoke pot and smell bad.”
Stan: Dude, dolphins are intelligent and friendly.
Cartman: Intelligent and friendly on rye bread with some mayonnaise.
[on a goat sent to him and his friends by some kids in Afghanistan] “It’s an Afghanistan goat, so it can’t stay here, or else it’ll choke on the sweet air of freedom.”
“Well, I looked in my mom’s closet and saw what I was getting for Christmas, an UltraVibe Pleasure 2000.”
natedogQuoteMay 24, 2009 at 5:56 am #300741
“Laugh and the world laughs with you, snore and you sleep alone.” – Anthony Burgess
May 24, 2009 at 6:23 am #300745May 24, 2009 at 6:43 am #300746
“so, is your head firmly wedged up your own delusional fantasy ass, or only on days ending in 9?”
dieAntagonistaQuoteMay 24, 2009 at 7:07 am #300750
If a man is offered a fact which goes against his instincts, he will scrutinize it closely, and unless the evidence is overwhelming, he will refuse to believe it. If, on the other hand, he is offered something which affords a reason for acting in accordance to his instincts, he will accept it even on the slightest evidence. The origin of myths is explained in this way.
-Bertrand Russell (I think)
egosumnemoQuoteMay 24, 2009 at 7:40 am #300754
I love that one, nyokki.
“No flying machine will ever fly from New York to Paris. No known motor can run at the requisite speed for four days without stopping.”
- Orville Wright
dieAntagonistaQuoteMay 24, 2009 at 7:47 am #300755
Well now I’m blushing. Die, you have to stop doing that.
I’d do a quote but, well, ok, here…
“Remember, you’re not paranoid if they’re REALLY out to get you.”
Now I’m going to go have kinky sex with the little woman. Thanks for coming out, folks. Hugs and Kisses!
garbledxmissionQuoteMay 24, 2009 at 3:50 pm #300767
“Its not Mickey Mouse, it’s tit dirt”
“You can go to Jolly Pirate Doughnuts and take a two hour shit for all I care.”
“Dont talk shit about Total!”
natedogQuoteMay 24, 2009 at 4:02 pm #300768
“Hey, hey, be nice people. Remember: no matter where you go, there you are.”
SumoSnipeQuoteMay 24, 2009 at 6:51 pm #300772
“Idealism is what precedes experience; cynicism is what follows.” – David T. Wolf
May 24, 2009 at 7:12 pm #300777May 24, 2009 at 7:50 pm #300779
Madame, all stories, if continued far enough, end in death, and he is no true-story teller who would keep that from you.
egosumnemoQuoteMay 24, 2009 at 9:01 pm #300787
“Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I’m not sure about the universe.” — Albert Einstein
May 24, 2009 at 10:36 pm #300791
Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity.
– Napoleon Bonaparte
FenQuoteMay 24, 2009 at 10:37 pm #300792
I shall not fear. Fear is the mind killer. Fear is the petty-death that brings total obliteration. I shall face my fear. I shall let it pass over me and through me and when it has passed I shall turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there shall be nothing. Only I will remain.
– Frank Herbert
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