My Confined Space

xerxes is such an awesome effin name. i should name my next kid that.

Comment by vutterfly — May 9, 2008 @ 6:41 pm

First! and Repost!

Comment by Kero — May 8, 2008 @ 5:40 pm

How do women compensate for being fat or having large vaginas?

By being bitches? Or do they buy expensive stuff too?

Comment by mAgnUS BUTTfoorson — May 8, 2008 @ 5:44 pm

Wow, I think I’d be content with my small penis. That’s a horrible color.

Comment by Exacerbate — May 8, 2008 @ 5:51 pm

Fat women compensate by either being smarter (TV comedian women) or more bitchy and goth/emo (fat 16 yr old girls) or being more american bitchy and self centred (Yank obese Mcdonalds munching fatasses).

Guys compensate with materialism and wankoff bling and cars, women compensate by going schizo in terms of attitude. They either become total sluts who are happy and alright with stuff, or total bitches who hate men and themselves.

Comment by Mack — May 8, 2008 @ 6:08 pm

MY boyfriend drives a MINI Cooper. You do the math.

Comment by ladyoftheorb — May 8, 2008 @ 7:14 pm

You have a boyfriend!?!?!? *shivers*

I’m an asshole.

Comment by Exacerbate — May 8, 2008 @ 8:12 pm

@kero

wtf are you two years old? Don’t make me enforce a fark.com like “first post” bullshit filter. that would suck

Comment by tiki god — May 8, 2008 @ 8:46 pm

“MY boyfriend drives a MINI Cooper. You do the math.”

He’s about 4 feet tall?

Comment by numb7rs — May 8, 2008 @ 9:04 pm

@tiki stfu and get on irc I need to ask you something.

Comment by Kero — May 8, 2008 @ 9:11 pm

I thought women bought shoes to compensate?

Comment by rattybad — May 8, 2008 @ 11:03 pm

i actually came up with two simple solutions to this it works 90% of the time the smaller the purse the bigger the waist the bigger the purse the smaller the waist and here is one for high school (dont test it in elementary middle school or junior high) backpack=virgin purse= nonvirgin nothing= town bicycle everyones had a turn now this only works for the female species i have yet to try it on males

Comment by michaelv13 — May 8, 2008 @ 11:32 pm

@Numb7ers:

He’s actually really tall, some number over 6 feet, and everyone always asks why he drives such a tiny car if he’s so tall. When the seat is all the way back, he can’t get the clutch down to the floor.

Those things are ridiculously roomy, and you can have crazy sex in them.

Comment by ladyoftheorb — May 9, 2008 @ 8:31 am

crazy sex? Like when you fuck an imaginary government agent and then try to eat your tinfoil hat?

I think we’ve covered how the lardo bitches compensate (I’m going with the big mouth theory).

What about those with the large vaginas? Probably the same thing?

The “smart” answer was funny. Fat chicks don’t compensate by being smart or funny. Everyone knows a woman can’t be considered smart or funny if you don’t want to fuck her.

Comment by mAgnUS BUTTfoorson — May 9, 2008 @ 9:13 am

Open wide beeotch. Obama is coming.

Comment by THE_GTC — May 7, 2008 @ 8:13 pm

INVISIBLE COCK

Comment by dookie_booty — May 8, 2008 @ 12:29 am

There is much truth in this picture.

Comment by Shanghai_Factor — April 23, 2008 @ 8:16 pm

yep.

Comment by acid_monkey1 — April 25, 2008 @ 5:46 pm

I went to school in Florida for four years, and the worst thing was having our house infested with black widdows. We also had a shitload of brown widdows, the lesser known, twice as venemous but half as aggressive relative to the black widdow. The biggest spider I ever saw was a banana spider.

http://davidmichaelkennedy.com/blog/media/heather-banana-spider.jpg

Theyre not dangerous though, but when you bike through their fucking huge webs, and they crawl all over you frantically. . . you are reminded that you are in fact, a girl.

Comment by Camiam321 — April 18, 2008 @ 7:27 am

This a cane spider, they are huge! My first experience with them was in Maui. I thought my Mother in Law was gonna crap her pants. Not dangerous, but it doesn’t really matter when you are standing naked in the shower and see one staring you down. BTW they are fast too! ~rs

Comment by rshep3 — April 18, 2008 @ 7:42 am

I knew a Vietnam vet who came home from the war and decided to live in a tree in the Okeefenokee Swamp for a while, on a branch, directly beneath a banana spider web. He said the spider taught him a few lessons about life and how to endure it—in that he would fuck up the web a little and watch the spider immediately begin rebuilding. That went on for several months until it bit him and he had to seek medical attention back in civilization; teaching him another life lesson: don’t fuck with spiders.

Comment by rattybad — April 18, 2008 @ 2:23 pm

I need a crucifix and some fire, now!

Comment by Neshamah — April 18, 2008 @ 2:56 pm

@cam:

Do you mean brown recluse? I’ve never heard of a brown widow.

Wiki returns this: Brown Widow which appears to be half as venomous.

Interesting.

Comment by RSIxidor — April 18, 2008 @ 4:30 pm

In Western PA we have these massive, territorial water spiders. They look like skinny tarantulas, and get really, really pissed you swim past their homes (in docks, between rocks, ETC), they come flying out of water as born from the bowels of hell at you.

I had the misfortune of finding one in an outhouse.

Comment by JazzyJazzyJazzHands — April 18, 2008 @ 4:43 pm

@JazzHands
so you’re saying that a spider shot out and nearly raepd you?

Goddamn spiders creep the shit out of me.

Comment by Jaypeezy — April 18, 2008 @ 4:54 pm

Oh man, Camiam321’s comment reminded me of all the banana spiders I’d see in Florida. He’s not lying. They seem to build their webs at face-level over walkways…but you never see it until you’re about 4 inches away. I probably saw 10 or 15 this way, but only ran in to one. They sit right in the middle of the web, so when it gets all stuck on you, they do indeed crawl all over, and they are indeed huge, and I was indeed reminded that I was a little crying girl.

Comment by Shanghai_Factor — April 18, 2008 @ 5:52 pm

If you’d allow pics of random MALE nudes too, then I might consider posting there

Comment by SouthernOracle — April 15, 2008 @ 8:23 am

The ones on the left are pretty damn big…

Comment by tehBob — April 15, 2008 @ 9:39 am

I’d allow it if it’s funny. Penises can be funny, right?

Comment by tiki god — April 15, 2008 @ 10:10 am

^^^
I think she means on your random nude site where funny is not required.

Comment by mAgnUS BUTTfoorson — April 15, 2008 @ 10:17 am

my flag pole is up!

Comment by nicklogan2 — April 15, 2008 @ 10:54 am

I’d love to wrap those flag around me!!

Comment by tenthletter — April 15, 2008 @ 11:05 am

God Bless America.

Comment by Gunface01 — April 15, 2008 @ 11:25 am

I pledge to allow no terrorist to burn those flags!

Comment by hvymetal86 — April 15, 2008 @ 12:45 pm

Magnus is correct! Hey.. didn’t your N used to be caps too? Seeing your name always reminds me of the big beefy WSM guys.

Comment by SouthernOracle — April 15, 2008 @ 8:18 pm

Obviously the guy that made the first pic was thinking of Fire Convoy/Optimus Prime, not Convoy/Optimus Prime.

This wouldn’t be an issue if the American translators would call the Autobot leaders something other than Optimus Prime

Comment by RSIxidor — April 14, 2008 @ 1:06 pm

holy shit, my eyes have been opened

Comment by tiki god — April 14, 2008 @ 1:27 pm

@tiki:

The scales have fallen, as it were?

Comment by tripolar — April 14, 2008 @ 4:16 pm

repost yet priceless

Comment by TrikYodz — April 13, 2008 @ 12:23 pm

You’re damn right we will. Then we’ll steal your equipment, eat your food, and drink your beer!

Comment by wookie_x — April 13, 2008 @ 1:01 pm

Epic Repost.

Comment by Phyreblade — April 14, 2008 @ 12:20 am

America… LOL! Who doesn’t hate America?!? Hands up. Now don’t be shy…

Comment by AbaddonTheDespoiler — April 14, 2008 @ 5:26 pm

The caption’s funny, but DR PHIL … UGH.

The guy’s an asshole, and a quack. If he was around in the Inquisition, no prizes for guessing what job he’d have.

Comment by Brevity Truta — April 10, 2008 @ 6:24 pm

Some day he’ll say that on his show in front of a large group of fat ppl and this would happen. 3 ton dogpile.

Comment by Breakdancingmonkey — April 10, 2008 @ 6:36 pm

I can hear him saying it in his Dr. Phil voice.
And that makes me lol.

Comment by suicydking — April 10, 2008 @ 7:12 pm

That is the truth.

Comment by FashaTheDog — April 9, 2008 @ 2:52 pm

Deadpool. Funniest SOB there ever was! BEST COMIC CHARACTER OF ALL TIME!

Comment by AbaddonTheDespoiler — April 9, 2008 @ 4:22 pm