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army of none

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army of none army of none Military interesting Humor

 army of none Military interesting Humor

 army of none Military interesting Humor

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Kids are smart

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Posted in Affiliate Program on August 4th, 2009 by | Report This Post | FavoriteLoadingAdd to favorites
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TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America . MARIA: Here it is. TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America ?

CLASS: Maria.

TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?

JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables.

TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell ‘crocodile?’ GLENN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L’

TEACHER: No, that’s wrong

GLENN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it. (I Love this kid)

TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?

DONALD: H I J K L M N O.

TEACHER: What are you talking about?

DONALD: Yesterday you said it’s H to O.

TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn’t have ten years ago.

WINNIE: Me!

TEACHER: Glen, why do you always get so dirty?

GLEN: Well, I’m a lot closer to the ground than you are.

TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with ‘ I.. ‘

MILLIE: I is..

TEACHER: No, Millie….. Always say, ‘I am.’

MILLIE:All right… ‘I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.’

TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father’s cherry tree, but also admitted it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn’t punish him?

LOUIS: Because George still had the axe in his hand

TEACHER: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?

SIMON: No sir, I don’t have to, my Mom is a good cook.

TEACHER: Clyde, your composition on ‘My Dog’ is exactly the same as your brother’s. Did you copy his?

CLYDE : No, sir. It’s the same dog.

TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?

HAROLD: A teacher

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Woman’s VS Man’s Poem

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Posted in Affiliate Program on August 3rd, 2009 by | Report This Post | FavoriteLoadingAdd to favorites
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WOMAN’S POEM
Before I lay me down to sleep, I pray for a man, who’s not a creep,
One who’s handsome, smart and strong.
One who loves to listen long, One who thinks before he speaks, One who’ll call, not wait for weeks.
I pray he’s gainfully employed, When I spend his cash, won’t be annoyed.
Pulls out my chair and opens my door, Massages my back and begs to do more.
Oh! Send me a man, who’ll make love to my mind, Knows what to answer to “how big is my behind?”
I pray that this man will love me to no end, And always be my very best friend.

MAN’S POEM
I pray for a deaf-mute nymphomaniac with huge boobs Who owns a liquor store and a golf course. This Doesn’t rhyme and I don’t give a crap.

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drive shaft

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Posted in Affiliate Program on July 27th, 2009 by | Report This Post | FavoriteLoadingAdd to favorites

drive shaft drive shaft

 drive shaft
 drive shaft

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down in front

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Posted in Affiliate Program on July 26th, 2009 by | Report This Post | FavoriteLoadingAdd to favorites
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down in front down in front interesting

 down in front interesting
 down in front interesting

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Pause for a moment for a sponsor!

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Recently On Internet-D

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Posted in Affiliate Program on July 25th, 2009 by | Report This Post | FavoriteLoadingAdd to favorites
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Woot off lights, Tron Trailers, Twitter and FUCK YOU by Lily Allen!

do a barrel roll

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Posted in Affiliate Program on July 25th, 2009 by | Report This Post | FavoriteLoadingAdd to favorites
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do a barrel roll do a barrel roll interesting

 do a barrel roll interesting
 do a barrel roll interesting

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cyber de Milo

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Posted in Affiliate Program on July 24th, 2009 by | Report This Post | FavoriteLoadingAdd to favorites
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cyber de milo cyber de Milo wtf interesting Humor

 cyber de Milo wtf interesting Humor
 cyber de Milo wtf interesting Humor

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Thur July 23 « Lefturn’s Funny Shit

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Posted in Affiliate Program on July 24th, 2009 by | Report This Post | FavoriteLoadingAdd to favorites
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A blonde went into a world wide message center to send a message to her mother overseas. When the man told her it would cost $300 she exclaimed, “I don’t have that kind of money!! But I would do ANYTHING to get a message to my mother in Poland!” The man arched an eyebrow. “Anything?” “Yes, anything” the blonde promised. With that, the man said, “Follow me” He walked into the next room and ordered, “Come in and close the door” She did. He then said, “Get on your knees” She did. Then he said, “Take down my zipper” She did. He said, “Go ahead…take it out” She took it out and grabbed hold of it with both hands. The man closed his eyes and whispered, “Well… go ahead!” The blonde slowly brought her lips closer, and while holding it close to her lips she said loudly “HELLO…..MOM, can you hear me???

via Thur July 23 « Lefturn’s Funny Shit.

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The Beer Goggler | Sometimes, All It Takes Is One More Drink…

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Posted in Affiliate Program on July 23rd, 2009 by | Report This Post | FavoriteLoadingAdd to favorites
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A woman was in a coma. She had been in it for months. The doctors were at a loss so they decided to try one last quasi-medical trick.

They went to her husband and said, “As crazy as this sounds, maybe a little oral sex will do the trick and bring her out of the coma.” The husband was skeptical, but they assured him that they’d close the curtains for privacy. The husband finally agreed and went into his wife’s room.

After a few minutes the woman’s monitor flatlined—no pulse, no heart rate.

The doctors ran back into the room. “What happened!?” they cried. The husband said, “I’m not sure—I think maybe she choked.”

via The Beer Goggler | Sometimes, All It Takes Is One More Drink….

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let’s fuck – all I need is u

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Posted in Affiliate Program on July 23rd, 2009 by | Report This Post | FavoriteLoadingAdd to favorites
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lets fuck all i need is u let’s fuck – all I need is u interesting Humor

 let’s fuck – all I need is u interesting Humor
 let’s fuck – all I need is u interesting Humor

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I’m on a boat

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Posted in Affiliate Program on July 22nd, 2009 by | Report This Post | FavoriteLoadingAdd to favorites

im on a boat I’m on a boat

 I’m on a boat
 I’m on a boat

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I gave my word to stop at third – but I didn’t

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Posted in Affiliate Program on July 21st, 2009 by | Report This Post | FavoriteLoadingAdd to favorites

i gave my word to stop at third but i didnt I gave my word to stop at third – but I didn’t

 I gave my word to stop at third – but I didn’t
 I gave my word to stop at third – but I didn’t

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captain save-a-hoe

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Posted in Affiliate Program on July 20th, 2009 by | Report This Post | FavoriteLoadingAdd to favorites

captain save a hoe captain save a hoe

 captain save a hoe
 captain save a hoe

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Life repeats itself

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Posted in Affiliate Program on July 19th, 2009 by | Report This Post | FavoriteLoadingAdd to favorites

At age 4 success is not peeing in your pants.

At age 12 success is having friends.

At age 16 success is having a drivers license.

At age 20 success is having sex.

At age 35 success is having money.

At age 50 success is having money.

At age 60 success is having sex.

At age 70 success is having a drivers license.

At age 75 success is having friends.

At age 80 success is not peeing in your pants.

from TikiHumor.com

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bullshit dog

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Posted in Affiliate Program on July 19th, 2009 by | Report This Post | FavoriteLoadingAdd to favorites

bullshit dog bullshit dog

 bullshit dog
 bullshit dog

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living statues

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Posted in Affiliate Program on July 18th, 2009 by | Report This Post | FavoriteLoadingAdd to favorites

There are two statues in a park…one of a nude man and one of a nude woman. They had been facing each other across a pathway for a hundred years, when one day an angel comes down from the sky and, with a single gesture, brings the two to life.

The angel tells them, “As a reward for being so patient through a hundred blazing summers and dismal winters, you have been given life for thirty minutes to do what you’ve wished to do the most.”

He looks at her, she looks at him, and they go running off together behind the shrubbery. The angel waits patiently as the bushes rustle and giggling ensues. After fifteen minutes, the two return, out of breath and laughing. The angel tells them, “You still have fifteen minutes left.”

The male statue asks the woman statue, “Would you like to do it again?”

“Oh, yes let’s,” she replies “but let’s change positions. This time, I’ll hold the pigeon down, and you shit on its head.”

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bobby boucher football camp

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Posted in Affiliate Program on July 18th, 2009 by | Report This Post | FavoriteLoadingAdd to favorites

bobby boucher football camp bobby boucher football camp

 bobby boucher football camp
 bobby boucher football camp

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back that ass up

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Posted in Affiliate Program on July 17th, 2009 by | Report This Post | FavoriteLoadingAdd to favorites

back that ass up back that ass up

 back that ass up
 back that ass up

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Clever Speeder Part II

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Posted in Affiliate Program on July 16th, 2009 by | Report This Post | FavoriteLoadingAdd to favorites

A young woman was pulled over for speeding. As the Pennsylvania State Trooper walked to her car window, flipping open his ticket book, she said “I bet you are going to sell me a ticket to the State Troopers Ball”.

He replied, “Pennsylvania State Troopers don’t have balls”.

There was a moment of silence while she smiled, and he realized what he’d just said. He then closed his book, got back in his patrol car and left. She was laughing too hard to start her car.

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