Titanic review

 

Experience James Cameron’s Titanic like never before. Leonardo DiCaprio and Kate Winslet shine in this unforgettable, epic love story. See why critics declare Titanic “a magnificent motion picture that remains spellbinding.”*Roger Ebert, CHICAGO SUN-TIMES

AMC got me good when they announced this movie was coming back to theaters, it’s among my wife’s favs, both for the movie itself and it’s soundtrack, so we were definitely going to go see it. For $18 a pop.

It’s still a great movie and we got a single digital copy of it to fight over, as neither AMC nor Paramount has returned my messages about were the other code is. The CGI holds up for the most part, if only because of how sparingly they used it, and the soundtrack is still amazingly beautiful.

The story however, well you shouldn’t look too closely at that, I remember being frustrated by it 20 years ago and I’m still frustrated by it. For the love of god Rose, why didn’t you bring jack up on the board with you!? Why did you throw that rock into the water?

gah! the hopeless romantics will defend those parts of the movie but it still bothers me.

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    3 Responses to Titanic review

    1. It’s a crap movie (I sat through it, it was cynically written to get teenage girls to watch it over and over).

      Rose didn’t bring Jack up onto the door because it would’ve sank. Someone did the math. The buoyancy of a piece of wood that size doesn’t support two people.

      I remember coming out of the theater and seeing a bunch of teenage girls lined up to see this crapfest. So I run up and yell “THE BOAT SINKS!” and they were all “NOOOO DON’T TELL ME THE ENDING!” because they were idiot giddygirls who didn’t know that the damn boat actually existed at one point IRL.

      These same giddygirls found a Titanic graveyard and decided that one of the graves was Jack’s (despite him BEING FICTIONAL) and they all started making pilgrimages to cry at a gravestone on behalf of a FICTIONAL PERSON who clearly was not the person buried there.

      This movie has been one giant idiotfest since it came out. It started a years-long hatred of DiCaprio which has only recently abated. His performance in Django Unchained redeemed him, and turned him from Generic Disposable Teenage Heartthrob #2809324 into a good actor.

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    2. “Don’t tell us the ending!” LOL! Sadly, I believe that really happened.

      I concur on the buoyancy thing. Mythbusters did that one and proved it wouldn’t support two people. Still, they probably could have both gotten half-way on and hoped to be rescued before hypothermia got them. But that wouldn’t be a “tragic love story.”
      A friend of mine took his girlfriend to see it. His tale: “She cried all the way walking through the lobby, kept crying the whole way home, and continued crying for another 45 minutes.”

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