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June 13, 2012 at 8:13 am
1984?
June 21, 2012 at 1:31 pm
This is the best moral system an omnipotent god could come up with?
And you ask me why I’m an atheist.
June 21, 2012 at 1:35 pm
Screw whoever made this. I’d do whatever it takes to become an immortal robot that doesn’t’ feel sadness, as long as I can pick the model. I’d like to look like Jehuty from Zone of the Enders, if possible.
June 21, 2012 at 1:41 pm
“When you die…”
No, no. You got it wrong. They don’t turn you into a robot incapable of sadness, they turn you into a hippie connected to an unlimited supply of all the drugs you could possibly want. So you’ll spend eternity being happy because it makes you happy to think that you’re happy.
June 21, 2012 at 3:56 pm
Oh, you wouldn’t just be incinerated. If your particular faith believes in Hell, you’d be put in a Wolverine-esque perpetually-healing body (sans adamantium,) suspended over fire that burns away your skin while being devoured from inside by fireproof maggots and force-fed rotting squid jizz so you could perpetually heal and be in agony and revulsion forever.
Yeah…God don’t like questions.
June 21, 2012 at 4:13 pm
While this is a common interpretation, it seems to have no basis in biblical scripture, except in revelation, which is too figuratively written to be taken as providing literal information.
June 21, 2012 at 8:41 pm
Really? Because I’m certain I saw a reference to squid jizz somewhere in Korinthians.
June 21, 2012 at 8:54 pm
Somehow I did not read the squid-jizz in your post the first time and I may have missed a sense of satire because of my mistake.
June 21, 2012 at 5:16 pm
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June 21, 2012 at 7:07 pm
Everyone is clones.
Think about it.
June 21, 2012 at 7:21 pm
Every day is Wednesday.
Think about that.
June 21, 2012 at 7:32 pm
Every drink is pizza.
Think about it.
June 22, 2012 at 2:57 am
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June 22, 2012 at 1:59 am
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June 22, 2012 at 5:46 pm
you don’t just get incinerated with the rest of the trash… that only ends up in your getting incinerated once. the bible actually says that you are getting eternal incineration: you get incinerated, but not consumed, so that you end up suffering pain and torment forever… so if you don’t end up supporting the regime, they respond by torturing you for the rest of eternity instead of letting you die.
moral: the bible, and every other scripture, is to be used as an allegorical guideline, not as a literal instruction manual.
June 23, 2012 at 9:51 am
How did you come to that last conclusion?
June 23, 2012 at 3:57 am
HAHA I AM BACK TO DESTROY YOU ALL NOW WIPE POOP ALL OVER YOUR FACE AND RUN DOWN THE STREET SCREAMING I AM THE STREETCONE FUCKER. YES YES HAHA THIS MAKES HAPPY INDIAN TOILET HAPPY. BIG DICKS IN THE BUTT. WHAT IS THIS BIGFOOT CROTCH? YOU ALL SMELL LIKE BIGFOOTS CROTCH AND LICK SKID MARKS AT THE BOTTOMS OF TOILETS. YUM YUM IN THE TUMMY WHEN YOU POOP ON SUPER MARKET FLOORS BE SURE TO WALK IN IT WITH YOUR FEET FEEL THE WARM POOP BETWEEN YOUR TOES AND THEN RUN HOME AND LICK YOUR TOES CLEAN. IT REMINDS ME OF GOING TO PUBLIC TOILETS AND LICKING THE TOILET SEATS OF EVERY TOILET I KNOW YOU LOVE TO DO THIS. NO SPRAY POOP ON THE WALL AND EAT IT AND BE SURE TO POOP ON PEOPLES CHESTS AND EAT IT OFF. IM FAMOUS STOP IT AND STOP EATING ALL THE CHEESECAKE YAHOO MADONNA GET AWAY IM SPIDERMAN. IM WOOPIE GOLDBURG YOU WILL ALL BOW TO BE AND SUFFER NOW CATCH YOUR FARTS IN JARS AND SELL THEM ON EBAY. I AM YOUR KING YOU WILL DO ALL OF THESE AND SUFFER AS WELL.
June 23, 2012 at 6:12 pm
Who the fuck are you?