weyland – yutani corp LOGO WALLPAPER

weyland - yutani corp LOGO WALLPAPER

I’d like to see one of their “better worlds”

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    4 Responses to weyland – yutani corp LOGO WALLPAPER

    1. from Cracked:

      The Business Plan:

      1. Capture the universe’s most dangerous, uncontrollable creature.
      2. ???
      3. Profit.

      What They Did Wrong:

      Let’s face it, alien xenomorphs are a terrible investment. They don’t follow orders, you can’t trap or control them and the only way they can breed is by killing every human in the vicinity. Nevertheless, where every sane person sees an unstoppable plague of violent death from beyond the moons, the megacorporation from the Alien series sees only profit.

      How? Well, that’s never quite clear.

      As the story progresses over four films, it becomes embarrassingly apparent that Weyland-Yutani, supposedly some kind of space-exploration company, uses all of its mainstream operations as a front for their secret master plan to collect and domesticate aliens–a project that carries a 100 percent failure rate over the two hundred years they’ve been trying.

      And although they never see any return on their investment, their methods only become more elaborate and costly. In Aliens, for instance, they waste mind-boggling amounts of money terraforming some shithole moon just because they caught wind that there might be aliens nearby.

      You can just imagine the board of directors calculating their profit margin year after year, frowning at the annual 10-billion-dollar hemorrhage that occurs every time they lose a thousand employees and a secure facility to an alien massacre they provoked. And that’s before the litigation begins.

      Weyland-Yutani is clearly making money doing something, or else they couldn’t afford to build all of those ships and complexes the aliens always wind up chasing people around in. Just stick with whatever that is. It’s like finding out BP is secretly trying to weaponize sharks at the expense of one exploding oil rig per quarter.

      Besides, what’s the plan, to sell the aliens to the military as weapons? That’s never going to pay off because as scary as they look, they don’t make very good soldiers. Really, they’re only good at killing unarmed people running scared through dimly lit corridors.


      • Copy pasta, but funny, so plus vote.

        The Alien films imply a sort of Corporate Oligarchy when it comes to Weyland – Yutani corp. Since they’ve probably hedged out all competition, they haven’t had to make decisions in a competitive environment in a while. That probably explains their poor decisions in the films.


      • Step 1: Terraform planet with the help of humans.
        Step 2: Deploy XWMDs.
        Step 3: Send a few androids to run the mining machines set up by the now dead humans.
        Step 4: Profit without having to pay wages.


    2. I actually found the 360 AVP game in a bargain bin today. I know it got bad reviews, but I’m really enjoying the multilayer. It’s hard to find players online, unfortunately.


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