(5 votes, average: 2.60 out of 5)
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It is my firm opinion that at this point in the battle, Batman loses.
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March 18, 2009 at 10:17 pm
are you suggesting that batman would be unprepared for this battle? cause he would be.
he would have some strong as fuck magnets in the ground, making wolverine immobile, so then he could just take his time and dissolved wolverine in acid.
or he would have a super magnet in his belt, and he would throw it at wolverine’s head, making him all confused.
March 22, 2009 at 10:06 pm
nope. By this point if Bats hasn’t put Wolvie down and they are at this range… fillet of bat.
After all, Cyclops floored Batman, and anything Scott can do, Logan has to go one better.
March 22, 2009 at 10:07 pm
sorry that was supposed to be @tiki god:
March 22, 2009 at 10:11 pm
I agree, with snipe, though a pre-emptive tactical placing of magnets is a pretty panzy way of doing things, I don’t think batman would go so far as to do something as silly as that and have wolvy fall for it and besides in regard to the picture, wolverine definitely wins this one.
March 22, 2009 at 10:17 pm
my moneys on batman, hes trained to fight close range, and the only reason cyclops would hurt bats is cause of the unexpected heat-beam eyes.
of course the wolverine healing factor would be a pain to deal with…
March 22, 2009 at 10:19 pm
I agree with everything stated above.. except one detail: Batman’s suit is stab-proof. Making Wolverine’s claw’s primary function non-occurring.
March 22, 2009 at 10:29 pm
@tiki god: Wolverine would simply go away for about 50 years. Then he’d return and pay his respects to Bruce Wayne’s rotted corpse. Batman loses this one by default in all permutations.
March 22, 2009 at 10:31 pm
@Dr.Devine: Batman’s suit is stab-proof for man-made knives, but probably not adamantium, which as I understand comic book metallurgy, cuts through anything but vibranium. Since the DC universe doesn’t have access to vibranium, then Marvel’s boy Wolverine wins.
@ItsBoosterGold: Don’t forget Wolverine’s metal framework (his skeleton). Remember the first scene of the 1st X-Men movie when that guy punched Logan? Broke his hand.
March 22, 2009 at 10:31 pm
@Dr.Devine: not to sound like a complete geek but wolverines claws have cut through steel like butter so i think the suit would lose
March 22, 2009 at 10:46 pm
However, if we’re playing by Adam West rules, he would simply have “Wolverine repellent”…. which would obviously overpower Wolvie’s superior sense of smell, rendering him unconscious.
March 22, 2009 at 11:01 pm
that was silly; Still Wolverine would win, there’s just too much he can do that batman cannot because batman is just a man. And wolverine is just a man, but made of metal. I don’t fucking know it’s fucking wolverine !
March 22, 2009 at 11:02 pm
Man, now I have to go into geek mode. Luckily this is the internet…
@ItsBoosterGold:
Cyclops eyes are concussive, like a punch. They radiate no heat. Cyclops also won because his eyes are his scope. Turn your head and look at something. If you were Cyclops, you would have just hit it with 100% accuracy.
@Dr.Devine:
Officially, Wolverine’s claws can cut through anything. No, it makes no sense scientifically, but neither does Cyclops’s “punch eye beams” or Batman’s perfect precognition and planning.
@SumoSnipe:
Except get a date. Seriously, Cyclops gets every fine piece of ass on the X-Men. Jean Grey, Madelyne Prior, Psylocke, Emma Frost?
Realistically this fight should go to Wolverine if they’re fighting this close, but since nothing about them is real, Batman wins. Like always. Seriously. Never fuck with Batman.
March 22, 2009 at 11:07 pm
@MattKirby</a@rattybad: @rattybad: @MattKirby: >: @schzoidmac: What, are you all dense? Are you retarded or something? Who the hell do you think that is? That’s the Goddamn Batman.
end of story
March 22, 2009 at 11:39 pm
lol, that is the funniest, line in a comic book that isn’t deadpool “I’m the god damn batman !” But still, one cuts motherfuckers up with foot long adamantium claws that are a part of his skeletal system which is also adamantium. Ones a guy in a fancy suit with gadgets…. Case Point ?
March 23, 2009 at 12:09 am
Wolvie could cut into bats armour but Batman would be hard to hit. I say if Batman knew the fight was comming he would win easy. If it was a “hi nice to meet you” on the street fight, well hard to say but Wolvie would likely win unless Batman could someone hog tie him.
March 23, 2009 at 12:11 am
@SumoSnipe: You have it right without overthinking it. My scenario involves wolverine strutting into the battlefield, then having electrified claws spring up at him from the ground to hold him down for an electrified cage comes and catches him, then it goes and suspends Logan in batman’s septic tank where Terry McGinnis finds him many years later.
However, as I word it, if wolverine is within striking distance, then Batman A)didnt have enough time to plan or B) didnt plan enough. From here, its one unstoppable swipe from batman’s death and one possibly unstoppable attack by Batman, and wolverine will hardly feel it no matter what it is.
March 23, 2009 at 12:16 am
I don’t see what Batman could do to hurt Wolverine in a streetfight. I also think he’d be fighting Wolverine from the Batwing. Wolverine’s speed and stealth have to match Batman’s, but Batman is never unprepared (which is getting hard to believe) He beat Superman. Paul_is_Drunk said it best: Never fuck with Batman.
Iron Man vs Batman is the real contest, since they are basically the same fucking character.
March 23, 2009 at 12:45 am
but… will it take off?
March 23, 2009 at 1:00 am
@Special Kail: LOL As much as I hate to admit it, the Goddam Batman always wins. Every time. Magic, Muscle, Adamantium, Mutant, Whatever. He always wins. It’s not even fair. By all rights, Wolvie should pwn him.
Heck Superman should have pwned him. Dude, almost everyone he has ever fought should have pwned him. He’s just a freaking human being. And yet he wins. And wins. And wins again. It’s un-freakin’ believable…
March 23, 2009 at 1:14 am
Batman is a goddamn pussy!! The only thing keeping his LAME ass story going is that he has awesome villians. The Joker is the shit and the writers know that if they kill any of his good bad guys his book will go to shit cause he in himself is fucking stupid.
If you want a badass Billionaire do gooder that is actually cool both as a hero and as a cover…try Iron man.
As far as WOlverine goes…he would end that lame ass bat without him even knowing what the fuck just happened, then he’d go punch Alfred in the nuts for not killing that lame ass douche in his sleep when he was a baby.
March 23, 2009 at 1:16 am
@rattybad: TRUE
March 23, 2009 at 1:39 am
@pantsoffdanceoff:
Teenage “Heath Ledger is God” fan is detected.
March 23, 2009 at 2:59 am
Wolverine will kill. Batman won’t. Wolverine would just keep comming back over and over and wear Batman down. Only way Batman is going to win is to stop If this made it into the books they would end it in a tie.
Real life however Logan would meet Bruce Wayne and smell the bat shit on his shoes then *SNIKT* “Ohhh MY God thats Bruce Wayne chunks hanging from…EVERYTHING!! Is that an intestine Oh My *Barf* How did he….*Barf* What kind of sick animal could…*Barf*”
Or something like that
March 23, 2009 at 5:09 am
and now for some persepctive:
this is the gayest batman/wolverine picture EVER
March 23, 2009 at 5:09 am
sriusly
go back and look at the pic and tell me they’re not about to start making out
March 23, 2009 at 6:20 am
@ItsBoosterGold: You can thank one of my comic book obsessed coworkers for this link: marvel.wikia.com/wiki/James_Howlett_(Earth-616) where I quote “Master Martial Artist: Wolverine has extraordinary hand-to-hand combat ability, and, alongside Captain America and Taskmaster, is considered one of the finest combatants on Earth.”
I gotta go with Wolverine on this one.
March 23, 2009 at 6:20 am
Batman let Wolvie get this close… Now he can kill him a 10000000000 times over be4 Wolvie can blink!
March 23, 2009 at 6:42 am
And according to this picture, Wolverine has a prehensile neck..
I will not dignify this (non-)argument with any rationalization
Wolverine wins.
period.
March 23, 2009 at 3:25 pm
@rattybad : if Batman has any clue to make a defense and offense against any known or possible enemy- then they are doomed. Batman always has a device or substance that renders any opponent’s powers obsolete. so, if he knows of their existance- he already has a way to deal with them.
Wolverine is sausage meat.
March 23, 2009 at 4:18 pm
Batman was trained by ninjas which means he is a ninja. Case closed.
March 23, 2009 at 9:51 pm
@orchunter: Aye… That is perhaps the only argument that makes me feel better about knowing the bats is gonna win.
March 23, 2009 at 10:57 pm
@orchunter: And the only people that can stand against ninja and have a chance of winning are samurai. And Wolvie wasn’t a trained samur… Wait.
March 23, 2009 at 11:28 pm
@BourbonDingo: nail. hammered.
besides. Marvel vs DC Logan beat Lobo. Has Bats beat Lobo?
March 23, 2009 at 11:30 pm
@natedog: FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
dammit yer right. guess Batman got confused by the yellow and thought that was Boy Wonder there for a moment.