Bruce lee

BruceLee.JPG (47 KB)

so technically chuck does have a weakness…. ZOMBIE BRUCE LEE!



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    greenie

    Three days after shooting this scene, Lee was bed-ridden. The only plausible reason was of contact poisoning with Norris’s bare skin. One year later after the publication of Way of the Dragon in 1972, Lee died of cerebral edema. A rumor went around that it was Norris’s breath that caused him to die, and it is yet to be debunked.

    natedog

    this phenomenon has also been attributed to affecting the gun that shot Bruce’s son decades later

    LeeHarveyOswald

    Chuck Norris does have a Boogeyman and that is Zombie Bruce Lee

    Annarchy

    I cannot count how many times I have had discussions about this. People seem to remember it backwards. And it pisses me off!

    camusapprentice

    greenie: Actually there is an alternate theory. Instead of contact poisoning, there is a sect that believes that Bruce Lee actually used the shao ling tiger bear claw strike on Chuck. Traditionally this attack leads to the weaker combatants death of spontaneous head explosion 3 hours after execution (poorly adapted in the Kill Bill movies).

    However, a never before seen loophole occurred. At the time of the strike, Chuck was a perfect combat equal to Bruce Lee. While Bruce’s experience won him that fight, both spirits were bound and Chuck slowly began to sap Bruce’s “chi”.

    Bruce fought valiantly to stop the process, but sadly, One year later after the publication of Way of the Dragon in 1972, Chuck inherited the last of Bruce’s “chi” and died of cerebral edema.

    camusapprentice

    camusapprentice: **amendment** in summation, Zombie Bruce Lee is foretold to have learned the secret of “Chi sap reversal” in the netherworld and would have the ability to engage Chuck in one final battle for all man kind.

    Annarchy

    camusapprentice:
    That would explain why Chuck Norris is invincible now. It would also explain the sightings of zombie Bruce Lee in downtown La Jolla, CA.

    Puulaahi

    Zombie Bruce Lee kicked Mike Huckabees ass and then laughed at Chuck Norris. True story.

    dub_1211

    Annarchy: this, however, does not explain nor take into account “Walker Texas Ranger”.

    rattybad

    camusapprentice: I have to ask: Tiger Bear Claw? It’s either a tiger claw or a bear claw. Tigers don’t have bear claws–unless they’re rampaging a bakery.

    Tenspace

    rattybad: It’s neither. It’s the “Tiger Bear” claw. Man, you don’t ever want to run into a tiger bear.

    Karatesaurus Rex

    Norris will meet the dirt in the early months of 2012, it has been in many a prophecy, the sounding horn starting the apocalypse is the sorrowful lament of the angels at Chuck’s passing.

    Phyreblade

    Misfit Punk84: No, I believe you are mistaken. Chuck cannot actually be killed. He is indestructable, and even if it were possible to be killed, he would come back as super cyborg Chuck zilla, and single handedly put an end to the Zombie apocalypse…

    tiki god

    I gotta say, Chuck Norris is a raving lunatic lately. has anyone actually see his internet ramblings or his shit on Fox New?

    Yeah, fox news. he’s apparently a somewhat regular over there because of his “extreme views”.

    what a fucktard.

    camusapprentice

    rattybad: My Boy! of course tigers dont have claws! they have paws! however the ancient mythical eastern creature for whom the strike is modeled for is roughly translated to “Tiger-Bear”.Tenspace: Thanks for letting me know im not the only one who knows of this beast!Phyreblade: I wish I could agree with you. I am now realizing that there is no part in the prophesy about chuck coming back after Zombie Bruce has his vengeance. However, Bruce will no doubt suggest that they form a zombie alliance tag team to kick all the zombies asses so that they may reign as god-kings over the grateful survivors

    greenie

    tiki god: Seconds later, Tiki was roundhouse kicked sober and voted Republican. Nobody talks about Chuck that way.

    Puulaahi

    Steven Seagal kicks Chuck Norris ass. Yes, that is how little respect I have for Chuck.

    iamevilhomer

    i thought chuck’s power came from his ratty hairpiece which was stolen from bruce’s merkin.

    Doctor Thompson

    For a full year prior to shooting this scene Chuck Norris was denied sleep. Instead of training he forced himself to watch Golden Girls at least 8 hours a day, in order to slow his reaction time. The day of the fight came and Chuck Norris still almost accidentally killed Bruce a total of fifteen times. At one point Bruce was dead for a full twenty minutes. There paramedics were about to call it when Chuck grabbed Bruce and breathed life into him. Bruce jumped out of Chuck Norris’s hands and still wanted to do the scene. Chuck agreed, but this time took thirteen horse tranquilizers, five grams of opium, and a bottle of Vicodin. When offered marijuana, he told the director that he doesn’t smoke that “pussy liberal shit.” The scene was finally shot successfully, although mid fight Chuck did have to readminister the drugs.

    Snarky Parker

    CHARLES BRONSON.

    Phyreblade

    LOL I just love Chuckisms…

    Annarchy

    dub_1211:
    Nothing explains that piece of shit show.

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