so technically chuck does have a weakness…. ZOMBIE BRUCE LEE!
Bruce lee
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March 6, 2009 at 5:24 pm
Three days after shooting this scene, Lee was bed-ridden. The only plausible reason was of contact poisoning with Norris’s bare skin. One year later after the publication of Way of the Dragon in 1972, Lee died of cerebral edema. A rumor went around that it was Norris’s breath that caused him to die, and it is yet to be debunked.
March 6, 2009 at 5:27 pm
this phenomenon has also been attributed to affecting the gun that shot Bruce’s son decades later
March 6, 2009 at 5:29 pm
Chuck Norris does have a Boogeyman and that is Zombie Bruce Lee
March 6, 2009 at 5:50 pm
I cannot count how many times I have had discussions about this. People seem to remember it backwards. And it pisses me off!
March 6, 2009 at 5:51 pm
@greenie: Actually there is an alternate theory. Instead of contact poisoning, there is a sect that believes that Bruce Lee actually used the shao ling tiger bear claw strike on Chuck. Traditionally this attack leads to the weaker combatants death of spontaneous head explosion 3 hours after execution (poorly adapted in the Kill Bill movies).
However, a never before seen loophole occurred. At the time of the strike, Chuck was a perfect combat equal to Bruce Lee. While Bruce’s experience won him that fight, both spirits were bound and Chuck slowly began to sap Bruce’s “chi”.
Bruce fought valiantly to stop the process, but sadly, One year later after the publication of Way of the Dragon in 1972, Chuck inherited the last of Bruce’s “chi” and died of cerebral edema.
March 6, 2009 at 5:55 pm
@camusapprentice: **amendment** in summation, Zombie Bruce Lee is foretold to have learned the secret of “Chi sap reversal” in the netherworld and would have the ability to engage Chuck in one final battle for all man kind.
March 6, 2009 at 6:03 pm
@camusapprentice:
That would explain why Chuck Norris is invincible now. It would also explain the sightings of zombie Bruce Lee in downtown La Jolla, CA.
March 6, 2009 at 6:04 pm
Zombie Bruce Lee kicked Mike Huckabees ass and then laughed at Chuck Norris. True story.
March 6, 2009 at 6:40 pm
@Annarchy: this, however, does not explain nor take into account “Walker Texas Ranger”.
March 6, 2009 at 7:38 pm
@camusapprentice: I have to ask: Tiger Bear Claw? It’s either a tiger claw or a bear claw. Tigers don’t have bear claws–unless they’re rampaging a bakery.
March 6, 2009 at 8:05 pm
whatever the truth may be.. be forwarned that there will eventually be a day where norris meets the dirt.. then were all screwed… cause the combine forces of zombie lee and norris will totally put the balance in the favor of the dead when the zombie holocaust hits.
think about!…
March 6, 2009 at 9:33 pm
@rattybad: It’s neither. It’s the “Tiger Bear” claw. Man, you don’t ever want to run into a tiger bear.
March 6, 2009 at 9:56 pm
Norris will meet the dirt in the early months of 2012, it has been in many a prophecy, the sounding horn starting the apocalypse is the sorrowful lament of the angels at Chuck’s passing.
March 6, 2009 at 11:10 pm
@Misfit Punk84: No, I believe you are mistaken. Chuck cannot actually be killed. He is indestructable, and even if it were possible to be killed, he would come back as super cyborg Chuck zilla, and single handedly put an end to the Zombie apocalypse…
March 7, 2009 at 12:35 am
I gotta say, Chuck Norris is a raving lunatic lately. has anyone actually see his internet ramblings or his shit on Fox New?
Yeah, fox news. he’s apparently a somewhat regular over there because of his “extreme views”.
what a fucktard.
March 7, 2009 at 1:10 am
@rattybad: My Boy! of course tigers dont have claws! they have paws! however the ancient mythical eastern creature for whom the strike is modeled for is roughly translated to “Tiger-Bear”.@Tenspace: Thanks for letting me know im not the only one who knows of this beast!@Phyreblade: I wish I could agree with you. I am now realizing that there is no part in the prophesy about chuck coming back after Zombie Bruce has his vengeance. However, Bruce will no doubt suggest that they form a zombie alliance tag team to kick all the zombies asses so that they may reign as god-kings over the grateful survivors
March 7, 2009 at 1:59 am
@tiki god: Seconds later, Tiki was roundhouse kicked sober and voted Republican. Nobody talks about Chuck that way.
March 7, 2009 at 2:10 am
Steven Seagal kicks Chuck Norris ass. Yes, that is how little respect I have for Chuck.
March 7, 2009 at 3:13 am
i thought chuck’s power came from his ratty hairpiece which was stolen from bruce’s merkin.
March 7, 2009 at 10:12 am
For a full year prior to shooting this scene Chuck Norris was denied sleep. Instead of training he forced himself to watch Golden Girls at least 8 hours a day, in order to slow his reaction time. The day of the fight came and Chuck Norris still almost accidentally killed Bruce a total of fifteen times. At one point Bruce was dead for a full twenty minutes. There paramedics were about to call it when Chuck grabbed Bruce and breathed life into him. Bruce jumped out of Chuck Norris’s hands and still wanted to do the scene. Chuck agreed, but this time took thirteen horse tranquilizers, five grams of opium, and a bottle of Vicodin. When offered marijuana, he told the director that he doesn’t smoke that “pussy liberal shit.” The scene was finally shot successfully, although mid fight Chuck did have to readminister the drugs.
March 7, 2009 at 11:21 am
CHARLES BRONSON.
March 7, 2009 at 5:37 pm
LOL I just love Chuckisms…
March 9, 2009 at 10:25 am
@dub_1211:
Nothing explains that piece of shit show.