Pirates Vs Ninjas

Pirates Vs Ninjas

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    50 Responses to Pirates Vs Ninjas

    1. I agree.

      Ninjas.

      Although I am partial to rum though…

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    2. the only reason why the ninja is in the picture is because he CHOOSES to be seen.

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    3. And what the pirate doesn’t realize is that he’s already been stabbed through the heart by the ninja, had his neck snapped by the monkey, and the ninja’s girlfriend (the hot lil asian number who’s choosing not to be seen) has poisoned his parrot.

      Ninja’s rule.

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    4. But the pirate is drunken ruffian.

      Therefore, he is going to win.

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    5. Naturally ninjas win. Always.

      The reason why they picked pirates as theoretical opponents is to make it appear as though they’re completely different and that it would make an interesting fight.

      Real ninjas are the most unorthodox people, aside from the Pope.

      But against people like Hattori Hanzou or Fujibayashi Nagato, no so called pirate would have a chance.

      @LukeV1-5:

      I recognise a pattern in the way you determine who would win in a nonsensical and unlikely battle. I don’t like it.

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    6. you guys. . . pirates have already won.
      who’s everywhere? pirates.
      who’s never anywhere? ninjas
      yeah, you can try and argue it out, but even that leads to a pirate victory, if you use the right argument. Talk is cheap, however.
      So, facts- which is a more frequent occurrence:
      Stealth assassination, or piracy in its myriad forms?
      The Mafia? Pirates. Corporate America? Pirates (With extremely rare deadly exceptions). Nearly every teenager with an MP3 file in the entire world? PIRATES. You yourself? 99.9% chance of PIRATE.
      I’ll even be fair and address stealth killings:
      Random unsolvable theft/murder? Unless performed with flawless accuracy and with impeccable honor- Not a Ninja.
      C.I.A. assassin? Too corporate, no honor- not a Ninja.

      The problem is that to be a ninja, rigid rules must be followed, even to the bitter dead end, resulting in near extinction. Pirates, by nature, are rebels- rule breakers, and team players, albeit massively dysfunctional ones.
      If the argument is “who’s more awesome?”
      Ninjas have a fighting chance, but I still feel they come just a bit short, and it all comes back to the rules.
      Yeah- they kill expertly, but you only get to see any awesome if the target is supposed to be a public example- most times an assassination needs to be disguised as anything but- and even the public awesome means that some guy with a paycheck gave the ninja permission
      In other words, there’s no style.
      Say what you want about a one on one fight- I don’t even care. The jocks in gym could beat up Stephen Hawking, but i think we know who’s more awesome.
      Here’s the “cool” fight right here:
      “Women want him- men want to be him”
      Women love pirates, pirate women are always either stacked or bad-ass, and one of the most awesome verbs in the universe is “Swashbuckle”
      I invite all contention to the contrary,
      however it should be reminded the real truth of the situation: eventually zombies would kill them both off completely.

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    7. @dieAntagonista: You do not like it because it is pirate thinking, and you are a ninja.

      And if it comes to a fight, as elzarcothepale points out, I will win.

      You should just pack up and go home right now.

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    8. @dieAntagonista: The first guy was a samurai. completely different from a ninja
      second was non fictional. if you wanna do that, then ill go jack sparrow on your ass.

      and @aarpie: what you dont realise is that the ninja has a hook in his bawls, (therefor imobilized) a LEAD bullet in his heart, the parot has shredded his throat and all the while the monkey lost balance, fell in the ocean and died, cause you all know monkies cant swim.
      and the ninjas “wife” went back to prostitution and died from a combo of syphylis and AIDS.
      pirates always rule.

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    9. ninjas. NINJAS. neen-jahs.

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    10. WTF? I would much rather be a pirate.

      A pint of rum a day is way better than yoga or whatever it is ninjas do to relax.

      And once you have all your skills, it would get boring being a ninja. Go to castle, kill a guy, repeat, probably with long lulls in between. Oh, and you have some fat boss telling you what to do, FFS.

      Sailing from tropical island to tropical island drunk? Stealing and ransoming for your needs? Non-stop partying? And even if you aren’t the captain, your boss is a f***ing Pirate!!!

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    11. Well you can’t poison a pirate, ’cause they’re rum-soaked. You can’t break their bones, ’cause they’re rum-soaked. You can’t confuse them or use mind control, ’cause they’re rum-soaked. I’m goin’ w/ pirates.

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    12. PIRATES

      But Ninjas are epic too.

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    13. @LukeV1-5:

      Whatever makes you feel secure at night. Amateur.

      @TrikYodz:

      I know the difference between samurais and ninjas. But a lot of people considered him to be more of a ninja, he changed his ways later on. Read up.
      And what’s wrong with non fictional? That was my point.

      You people are crazy. Mark my words, next time you meet a ninja you’ll regret your delusions.

      Reply

    14. Ninjas:I don’t care what you think. I have history bitches!

      en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shaolin_Kung_Fu#Pirates

      Long story short, Ninjas: over 100, Pirates 4

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    15. Damned shinobi snobs said I was too big to be part of their hedge, so screw em.
      Besides. Vikings=Early Pirates.
      So sound the horns and call the cry
      HOW MANY OF THEM CAN WE MAKE DIE!

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    16. @SumoSnipe: vikings! hells yea!

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    17. @TGGeko: Dude, Japanese pirates don’t even count.

      Everyone knows that piracy is the thing the Japanese fail most at.

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    18. @TGGeko:
      Ninjas would win, but you can’t use wikipedia as legitimate argument.

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    19. Batman is ninja trained.
      I hate to admit it. But the whole world as pirates couldn’t beat Batman.
      Pirates are cooler though.

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    20. Batman is only ninja trained in the movies. In the comics his main focus is martial arts like judo, being a ninja is just a Hollywood add-on.

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    21. @chupathingy: Point means nothing.
      How many different versions of batman are there? How many are not awesome?

      So many awesome batmans vs pirates?
      Pirates get laid all the time too!
      Batman never sleeps with women so he would have uber backed-up-testosterone strength!

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    22. @elzarcothepale: You seem to not have grasped the subtleties of the way of the Shinobi… You do not see ninjas anywhere because they don’t want to be seen. It’s that simple. The absence of evidence is not evidence of absence.

      There is no world in which pirates could defeat ninjas. It’s just not possible. There are a million fictional reasons, and a gazillion factual, historically verifiable reasons. Give it up already. 😛

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    23. @Phyreblade: Come on man. If Ninjas are so kick ass, why are so many pro sports teams named after pirates or a derivative of pirates? ¶

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    24. @LukeV1-5: The Wako raided as far as India and took on the Portugese. I think that counts as one for the Pirates column.

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    25. Five words..as gay as they are..

      KAGE BUNSHIN NO JUTSU!

      (lmao i laugh if anyone gets it)

      (p.s. im a pirate fan, cmon honestly rumbums>tightlights anyday)

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    26. *edit* my bad, 4 words, i cant count xD

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    27. have a vid about vikings. dares ya to find cool/funny ones about ninjas. Yes have seen all “Ask a ninja”

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    28. @SumoSnipe:
      LOL easy… Ninjas have been banned from pro sports. They keep throwing shuriken in the refs eyes…

      @Mootea: ROFL what is sad is that not only do I recognize where that’s from, I sometimes wonder if any of the Kunoichi know how to do Sexy No Jutsu… Dattebayo!

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    29. Hm. Ya got a point there…IN YER EYE!

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    30. For what its worth, my vote is for Robots.

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    31. @SumoSnipe: LOL and you have one… ON THE TOP OF YOUR HEAD!! HAH!

      @RSIxidor: Robots…? Only the 8-man would stand a chance…

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    32. ON THE SUBJECT OF BATMAN

      In the newest generation of Batman movies, Christian Bale portrays a character by name of Batman.

      Another well-known movie of Bale’s is American Psycho.

      In which he portrays a character by name of Bateman.

      BATeMAN

      CONSPIRACY??

      I keep making this point, but no one is alarmed.

      I must take it to the highest court in the land.

      Reply

    33. @LukeV1-5:

      äöljadjdfskeß3ßfkc#ö; I used to say the same thing, shortly after the Batman movie came out.

      One day I whispered it to my friend in class, so my English teacher came from behind and hit me with his book on my head.

      I haven’t claimed anything of that nature ever since.

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    34. People hitting you with books from behind is traumatic.

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    35. @Phyreblade: Of course I do. How else am I supposed to perch my little spinning propeller up there?

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    36. Oh yeah, and on Mythbusters “Ninjas pt 2” Kari stated she would rather be a pirate. So neenerth neenerth neenerth!

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    37. @dieAntagonista: ah. that was the classic pirate attack: “Book to ye head”
      pirates dont care to read all that much, so they either burn em for heat or hit people with them. you should just be happy that the book wasnt on fire.
      woah. a pirate attacked you. what do you do now?

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    38. @LukeV1-5: Well they *are* both psychopaths…

      @dieAntagonista: Wait… wat? Ooookkk… soooo… I don’t get it. Did your English teacher hit you on the head for disrupting class, or sullying The Bats good name?

      @SumoSnipe: Bah! Kari was always one to root for the underdog… 😛

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    39. @TrikYodz:

      My English teacher is a fine man, probably the finest teacher I ever had. He has nothing to do with that scum.

      @Phyreblade:

      Now that you asked, I’m wondering myself. He is the quirky type so I honestly don’t know if he overheard the actual conversation and that’s why he did it.
      WHAT A TWIST ZOMG.

      Reply

    40. @Phyreblade:

      Indeed. I’ll keep you updated, on any new relevant events, or should anything occur that would indicate on which side my professor Pölzl really is.

      Dun dun duuuuuuuuuuun.

      Reply

    41. @Phyreblade:

      Ahahaha. Nice. The first one was the best. And then I watched ‘My cat’s first orgasm’ in the related videos. >_>

      Reply

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