Diane Is Going To Hell

Diane Is Going To Hell


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    Drunkin
    Member

    This is what fanatical Christians actually believe

    metalhead2061
    Member

    Come on now, that’s just silly.

    Theo11
    Member

    I lol’d.

    SumoSnipe
    Member
    SumoSnipe

    Really, really need our dollars, Jerry? Shouldn’t have been playing the stocks or ponies with the faithfuls donations buddy.

    DullMentalRacket
    Member
    DullMentalRacket

    an admiral fake

    Puulaahi
    Member

    Religion, gotta love it.

    Tetsuo137
    Member

    Personally I’m a Christian, and this right here is not Christianity. This is fanatical and I don’t follow that fucking load of bullshit. Not to get biblical but if you look in the bible and read about King David, it says he “Danced before the Lord”.

    And even if it is fake, there are those who are fanatical fucks like Jerry Falwell who say that dancing leads to hell. They should take demon cock poundings and go spread their horseshit somewhere else.

    WhiskeyTango
    Member

    Wow, these guys are real. Cuckoo Cuckoo.

    ieattime20
    Member

    @DullMentalRacket: Yeah, I was about to tell you that if you really believe this is fake you either don’t live in the South or do and are really lucky.

    Come on, people believe in Scientology, you don’t think that some crazy sect Christian factions produce their own documentation?

    the_wanderer
    Member
    the_wanderer

    You have no idea what it’s like to live near that. No idea.

    greenie
    Member

    @ the_wanderer:

    I live in Utah. I got a good idea.

    Just This Guy, You Know?
    Member

    @Tetsuo137: I grew up in a Baptist church, and am myself a recovering Baptist, and this is not far from the truth. Perhaps dated, but yes, the sentiment was quite common as recently as fifty years ago.

    flintlocke
    Member

    @DullMentalRacket:

    admiral fake?

    It’s a trap!

    Just This Guy, You Know?
    Member

    @Record Store Tough Guy: Although upon further review, this particular flier may be someone satirizing the church in question, and not actually published by the church.

    Just This Guy, You Know?
    Member

    @Puulaahi: That’s why I prefer spirituality. The older I get, the more of a Deist I become.

    brisingre
    Member

    Guh. I’m not sure if this is real, (“I always trust Reverend Falwell” feels a bit Orwellian for Falwell to have put it there himself,) but it’s not crazier than the actual thing.

    Puulaahi
    Member

    @the_wanderer: I don’t want to know what it’s like. Scary enough here on the west coast having Jehovah’s witnesses coming door to door.

    Puulaahi
    Member

    @Record Store Tough Guy: I dunno what I am. But Paganism is cool. Worshipping the earth itself. But I really am not all that religious.

    Demon
    Member

    BRB, dancing my way to hell wheeeeee!

    Just This Guy, You Know?
    Member

    @Puulaahi: Me either. I heard a story once, about how God showed Man the Truth, then the Devil came along and said “Here, let me write that down and organize that for you,” and invented Religion. Which pretty much sums up my objections to organized religion.

    Twee
    Member
    Twee

    Heh, good funny stuff. I’m pretty sure this is a fake.
    At least someone there believes dancing is bad though. I searched within the Thomas Road Baptist Church website for the word dance and got two sermons. The first is to a sermon that actually implies dancing will send you to hell. The second is quoting Ecclesiastes where it says: a time to mourn, and a time to dance; a time to cast away stones, etc.
    This is my first time attempting to make links in comments- my apologies in advance for my likely failure.

    storminmormon
    Member

    @greenie: i hear you. I made the ultimate mistake and joined the church for a girl. Where in Utah?

    Elepski
    Member

    *face palm*

    If only I could carry a pick axe and fulfill my urges when I see this type of stuff.

    Twee
    Member
    Twee

    Woo, the first one worked at least. Here’s that second one again; just for the sake of practice. If it’s broken again, I’ll stop at that.

    PreciousLilywhite
    Member

    My family are freaks like this. We live close to that church, so my grandparents would go to Liberty to see Falwell speak before he died. My grandfather said his passing was just another sign the end is near and I need to get right with the lord before I end up in Hell.

    wookie_x
    Member

    I can’t believe no one else here has said this….

    We can dance if we want to
    We can leave your friends behind
    ‘Cause your friends don’t dance and if they don’t dance
    Well they’re no friends of mine
    I say, we can go where we want to
    A place where they will never find
    And we can act like we come from out of this world
    Leave the real one far behind
    And we can dance

    greenie
    Member

    @storminmormon: Moab. The liberal part of the state. Its only half bad down here! Where you at?

    TrAyVon'S GhOSt, nuCca
    Member

    I can’t believe no one else here has seen Footloose?

    greenie
    Member

    Heh. Time for six degrees of Seperation staring Kevin Bacon.

    My ex fiance’s bestfriends husbands mothers house was near the set of footloose, and Kevin Bacon took a piss in their bathroom.

    I know that wasn’t six, but fuck it.

    TrAyVon'S GhOSt, nuCca
    Member

    Fun fact: it you cook bacon and while its still really hot and spattering grease you place it on your asshole it burns.

    Bet you didn’t know that.

    storminmormon
    Member

    @greenie: West Valley City. But I get shit all the time because I support the wrong school from Utah. According to them, I am just an immoral, sex-crazy, hell-raising, drunken Ute.

    Puulaahi
    Member

    I only watch Kevin Bacon movies when I am bored and nothing else is on.

    greenie
    Member

    @storminmormon: Yeah, I bet that sucks. I dated a girl from WVC and she was in your same boat. Wonder what ever happened to her.

    Oh and get this, I was Episcopalian and I went to SNOW College. So in their eyes, I was a immoral, sex-crazy, hell-bound, drunken Badger.

    Imagine my hell.

    nyoki
    Member

    @mAgnUS BUTTfoorson: I’ve tried so hard to forget it.

    storminmormon
    Member

    @greenie: haha, thats quite the mixture. How did you end up at SNOW?

    But I have no problem sleeping at night because our football and basketball teams humbled BYU this year.

    greenie
    Member

    @storminmormon:

    I got a full ride there because of my criminal justice background and because of leadership positions I’ve held. And it was cheap.

    I originally planned to go to UTAH, but didn’t have the money to do so.

    And yeah, a kid from my church is the center for the Football team. This town is pretty much a U of U town now:)

    nyoki
    Member

    @mAgnUS BUTTfoorson:

    Fun fact: it you cook bacon and while its still really hot and spattering grease you place it on your asshole it burns.

    Bet you didn’t know that.

    Is that what I’ve doin’ wrong all this time?

    nyoki
    Member

    err *face palm*

    Phyreblade
    Member

    @mAgnUS BUTTfoorson: Watched it… Thought that kind of stuff only happened in the movies… It’s Insanity… Madness i tell you…

    MonkeyHitman
    Member

    no it’s BACON !!!!

    MonkeyHitman
    Member

    with nipples^_^

    Elepski
    Member

    I have too…

    traptin85
    Member

    penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis vagina penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis penis

    gx5000
    Member

    Can we just agree to round them all up and
    NUKE NUKE NUKE….

    Religion, competing to control you with the state since, huh, the freakin’ beginning.

    Lamb
    Member

    I’m going to Hell doing the Cha-Cha… 1, 2, 3, hip! 1, 2 ,3, hip!

    VanZant
    Member

    This cannot be real.

    vygramul
    Member

    I hate to say it, but it might be real. I Googled Thomas Road Baptist Church and found their website, and then searched it for “dancing”.

    In one of their sermons, they talked about one father’s “Great Protection Rules” for his daughter, and it included no dancing: trbc.org/new/sermons.php?url=20020616.html

    HoChunk
    Member

    @VanZant: I’ve seen worse that WAS real, ‘tho I’m not sure this one is.

    efraiel
    Member

    thats hillarious 🙂 the sad this is that i go to Liberty….ha ha

    whytryduex
    Member

    Can’t we just all accept there’s no Jesus? Then we can dance all we want 😀

    Silverwolf
    Member

    @gx5000: What we need to do is round up all religious people (not just Christians; everybody who qualifies as a major buzz-kill and shoves their beliefs down others’ throats) and NUKE NUKE NUKE NUKE.

    Also, may AC/DC forgive me, but… *sings* I’m on the daaaaancefloor to hell!

    reptilecobra13
    Member

    This is why religion is good, but religious extremism is bad.

    karellen
    Member
    karellen

    The mother of the idiots is always pregnant…..

    RSIxidor
    Member

    EXISTENCE AS ONE OF SATAN’S MINIONS?

    Fuck yeah, I gotta get dancing, that sounds fun!

    Holy Christ, this thing has to be a joke.

    Phyreblade
    Member

    @ColombianMonkey: Ah… yes bacon! Of course, my bad, I stand corrected 🙂

    @RSIxidor:

    EXISTENCE AS ONE OF SATAN’S MINIONS?

    Yeah… Just a *wee bit* over the top… lol

    SumoSnipe
    Member
    SumoSnipe

    Joke or not this thread needs Ray Stevens:

    j_bryon
    Member

    REAL Christians DO NOT BELIEVE THIS! There is no place in the Bible, which is the ONLY real instruction one needs to follow, about dancing leading to Hell.

    @SumoSnipe: YES!

    Phyreblade
    Member

    @j_bryon: You know what’s funny about that? People actually had to decide which sections of the the complete set of inspired writings the Bible is made up of would actually become The Bible as it exists today…

    DisplacedTexan
    Member

    i realize i’m a little late on this one… first of all i am a christian, but i personally think the majority of people that act like this are the biggest hypocrites on the planet. anyhow check out what these “christians” think of the movie “Old School”

    www.christiananswers.net/spotlight/movies/2003/oldschool.html

    Phyreblade
    Member

    @DisplacedTexan:
    You know it’s always the extremist fanatical few who have the loudest voices, regardless of the religion or belief system in question. People don’t seem to know or remember that…

    And as for the movie “Old School”, I’ve never been a fan of sophomoric schlock myself, but seriously, to label it all that is immoral in the world? For cryin’ out loud…

    karellen
    Member
    karellen

    Of course not all christians believe this! Fortunately there are not so many idiot people in the world (there is enough, but not so much). Writing such thing in place of the christianity or in the name of a religion is an insult to all people that live religion with intelligence, they sould be banned from civilized world like beasts… If they were grown up inside the real world and not in a crystal bowl maybe they would know about the crap they are trying to spread (with a lot of damage for those people who has not anything else… Read more »

    justonemango
    Member

    @Tetsuo137: really now? i never would have guessed. nobody in the right mind (of any religion) would have such a stupid thought. thank you.

    steve-o
    Guest
    steve-o

    Diane here.

    Fuck you, you self-righteous, miserable-living, money-hoovering fraudulent pricks.

    I’m gonna keep on dancing, and on my death bed, I shall think of how much I enjoyed my life. If I’m wrong, no god worth bothering about is going to send me to hell for dancing! Sheesh.



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