How?

Number one threat to America caught in action.

@bright green: No Wi-Fi in Yellow-stone. Must go to city. (TAXI!!!)

@Asinine: Hardly. If it were a zombie it’d be a lot worse.

Im a weird person. I said id never hunt. but then I said id never say never about doing something, so I decided that I would hunt only under the circumstances that I disappeared into the Yukon for a month with nothing but a knife, a flint, a canteen, and an empty backpack and when I came back, I would be carrying the pelt of a grizzly on my back. That way, Id make up for all the idiots that go hunting for baby rabbits with machine guns. I probably wouldn’t come back, but if I did, id have a… Read more »

Bear: Graaaaaaawr rwaaaaaaaaaaaar rwaaaaaaar graaaaaaaaar

Cab Driver: Yes sir,

WHO IS DRIVING CAR? OH MY GOD, BEAR IS DRIVING CAR! HOW CAN THAT BE??!!

@camusapprentice: But would you let the bear ride in the passenger seat?

@annarchy: I most certainly would. He would also get a cape and a crown.

@camusapprentice: before or after you shoot and stuff him?

@Annarchy: There you go throwing a kink in my plan. I would much rather have a live bear in my future uber-mansion than a dead one. And adding the cape and the crown to the live bear… that would be fun when I invite people over.

@camusapprentice: You over dramatize the sport of hunting. Wild animals have far superior scenses and survival instincts than humans. If, and I stress IF, you even got to see a grizzly, with your no doubt extraordinary skills of stealth and tracking, you would be instant bear shit.

Bear sez: “Jesus Christ, it’s a lion!! Everybody back in the cab!”

@Lakiamia: For the record, a grizzly would smoke a lion. A single lion that is, or maybe two, but not an entire pride.

@the3g_ipwn: Ya, that instant bear shit think was the point. You are one of those sad people that underdramatizes hunting. What do you hunt for? Deer? I bet they really posed a personal threat to you so you should have killed them. Oh no, you did it for fun didnt you? well I can kill a kid. They have far greater agility that me and their parents will even the playing field, right? Hunt if you want, I have nothing against it. I just think you could take more from it than you do. You ease your concious with false… Read more »

IT’S A LION, GET IN THE CAR! OH SHIT, IT’S A BEAR GET OUT OF THE CAR! IT’S A LION, GET IN THE CAR! OH SHIT, IT’S A BEAR GET OUT OF THE CAR! IT’S A LION, GET IN THE CAR! OH SHIT, IT’S A BEAR GET OUT OF THE CAR! IT’S A LION, GET IN THE CAR! OH SHIT, IT’S A BEAR GET OUT OF THE CAR! IT’S A LION, GET IN THE CAR! OH SHIT, IT’S A BEAR GET OUT OF THE CAR! IT’S A LION, GET IN THE CAR! OH SHIT, IT’S A BEAR GET OUT OF… Read more »

bear says: ‘follow that car’

@Dreth: lmao

@Dreth: Repeat till eaten by either bear or lion.

After which:

@aleph: Which car, sir? The Lions or the Tigers?

“Take me to Tim Treadwell’s house, please. We have a dinner date.”