Texas

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Fuck yeah, Texas.

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    dieAntagonista
    Member

    I ain’t shit

    Saborlas
    Member

    If I owned Texas and Hell, I’d rent out Texas and live in Hell. I mess with Texass whenever I damn well please. The state with the biggest hats and the least under them. The same could be said about the belt buckles. The state where you can look the farthest and see the least. One of the state monuments is a place where Texass got its ASS KICKED by Mexico, losing several big name people who apparently weren’t as badass as Texans claim. And, as much as Alaska has irritated me recently, it’s still larger than Texass. There is… Read more »

    Exacerbate
    Member

    I never understood why Texans are so obsessed with their state and get offended when anyone says something bad about it.

    That being said, fuck Texas.

    teezy weezy
    Member

    “if you ain’t Texan, you ain’t shit” so if you ARE Texan you ARE shit?

    Cargen
    Member

    I live in texas, and i ain’t proud. but that might just be cause i am a beaner.

    Luke Magnifico
    Member

    I fucking hate Texas.

    For no reason.

    From now on, I just hate it so much.

    Guayec
    Member

    Fuck yeah, Texas?

    Let me fix that:

    Fuck you, Texas.

    Marrock
    Member

    George Bernard Shaw’s notion that “Patriotism is your conviction that this country is superior to all others because you were born in it.” applies to states as well, unfortunately.

    Also, if it weren’t for folks from other so-called “lesser” states, there would be no texas.

    Puulaahi
    Member

    Mess with Texas.

    Dreth
    Member

    Fool me once, shame on me. Fool me twice, fuck you Texas.

    twotone
    Member

    Everything is bigger and dumber in Texas.

    The Matrix: Rebooted
    Member

    “IF YOU AINT TEXAN YOU AINT SHIT.”
    Texas sounds shitty.

    mld
    Member

    Vermont managed to be its own country a LOT longer than Texas managed, and you don’t hear us getting all uppity about it.
    Texans have a serious inferiority complex going.. big hats, big trucks, big boots, big ranches.. must be compensating for something…

    awfulintentions
    Member

    Texas sucks.

    Every time Texas gets hit by a Hurricane, they piss and moan like babies. Everything is bigger in Texas except their balls. Okay, Ike suck, but yeah, my neck of the woods got hit by two strong Catagory three’s two seasons in a row, with some assorted other hurricanes tossed in. ( Ike was weak Cat 3 I believe, and came in as a Cat 2 ) Texas gets hit by a Cat 1 and they whine like they got hit by Katrina or some such.

    Pansies.

    Puulaahi
    Member

    Much of what people hate about America comes from Texas. Pretty sure you have to be an asshole to live there.

    Recondomoe
    Member

    Remember a bumper sticker seen during a deployment “Welcome to Texas, now GTGO!”

    RSIxidor
    Member

    @awful:

    I’ve not once heard a Texan bitch or moan about the hurricanes, unless they live where it hit, and they don’t start bitching till afterward. At least we have a state that managed to build roads that would effectively allow its citizens to evacuate their cities before the hurricane hit, and none of that silly bureaucracy that would keep those cities from being rebuilt afterward.

    @mid

    But they didn’t have to fight Mexicans. Texans are so proud of their heritage they have a monument to a battle they LOST and view it as a celebration of their past.

    RSIxidor
    Member

    Also, how many cars did it take to bring the Mexican army to the Alamo?

    2

    slickrick
    Member

    Wow, such hostility and jealousy, we must be doing something right down here to get everyone’s brown star so puckered.

    If your from Texas your not shit, you’re THE shit. Big difference. Have a nice day losers….

    jascas_
    Member

    werd, slickrick…lotta folks taking shots at us – guess instead of defending their own state, they have to make salacious generalizations about Texas. I ordinarily do not engage in debates over teh interwebs and I know I’m late to the party, but I’ve been moving my belongings to our new place & I don’t want to get up from my computer, so here we go, responding in the order I read them: re: state size vs. Alaska. No one in Texas claims our state is the largest in the union, nor do we harbor or display any animosity toward Alaska.… Read more »

    Nurgen
    Member
    Nurgen

    The problem is that Texas loves to elect fundamentalist religious folk into power, and they put more of the same on the board of education. Then, because of its very large population, the school textbooks chosen by the Texas board of education get huge print runs, and other books often don’t get print runs at all, leaving some states, particularly in the east, with no option but to use science and history textbooks that were selected by fundamentalist Christians. That causes some serious damage on the edumacation front… if it weren’t for the balancing factor of California, the U.S might… Read more »

    Dreth
    Member

    pwn3d right there and then.

    twotone
    Member

    Goodness, what a lengthy response. It only took my ESL ass three hours to read. So if you have so much to stand up for Texas about, what the fuck is up with the retards wearing cowboy hats, fur coats, and shit kickers in the middle of August?

    I saw a gaggle of them fools getting on my plane from Huntsville to DFW.

    jascas_
    Member

    lol…congrats on getting through it, twotone.

    Cowboy hats: keeps sun out of your eyes really well, they’re sturdy, and it makes bald old cowboys look maybe not bald, maybe.

    Fur coats: those were pimps, not retards.

    Shit kickers: good boots can be more comfortable than anything else on your feet, other than flip flops (of which I am a huge fan). The cowboy type also get used to wearing them & see tennis-shoes as feminine.

    Lastly, this is Texas, remember, so we’re all used to the heat. 75 degrees is cold.

    twotone
    Member

    No, I mean they were wearing all of those items as a single outfit. 40 something year olds in those ridiculous gittups…..

    jascas_
    Member

    My apologies, twotone. In that case, they were almost definitely visitors to our great state and were enthusiastically – albeit confusedly – trying to participate in our culture.

    For the record, I was born & raised here & have never worn Wrangler jeans, a cowboy hat, used a big belt buckle, or ridden a horse as anything other than a novelty experience (twice when I was a kid).

    CHSDRM
    Member

    Hopefully another hurricane comes along and finally wipes them all out. Oh and some tornadoes for the trailer park folk ;).

    mumuat6
    Member
    mumuat6

    I live in Texas and Texas IS HELL!

    mumuat6
    Member
    mumuat6

    By the way, we’re not all dumb rednecks.

    Caio
    Member

    Jascas_ I’m not going to go all tl;dr on you like you done on us (you owe me a new page down key by the way) but I’m just gonna say that you just proved everyone’s point about Texas, dumbass.

    jascas_
    Member

    psst. Caio. If you’re just gonna say that, you have to say why you think so, not just that you think I proved the point. And at what point did I “go all tl;dr” on you all? Hmm?

    I’m sure this will never be commented on again, since it’s now halfway through October, but here’s to trying…



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