God And Religion = Magic!

religion-vs-harry-potter

 God and religion are just another form of magic.

 You don’t believe in Harry Potter do you? Then why believe in Jesus? Harry Potter could kick Jesus’s ass. He beat fucking voldemort.



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    ginsu

    If you believe this you are a bastard

    Grumbles

    No no no, you have it all wrong. See, magic is when someone or a group of people invoke the aid of some mystical and supernatural entity to accomplish their own personal goals and agendas, whereas religion is when someone or a group of people invoke the aid of some a God to accomplish their own personal goals and agendas. Big difference, as you can see.

    Grumbles

    No no no, you have it all wrong. See, magic is when someone or a group of people invoke the aid of some mystical and supernatural entity to accomplish their own personal goals and agendas, whereas religion is when someone or a group of people invoke the aid of some God to accomplish their own personal goals and agendas. Big difference, as you can see.

    nippletwister

    Ah, namecalling. The height of religious logic. At least Jesus won’t be offended-you can’t offend a fictional characters who exists only in a shitty fairy tale and the minds of cowardly idiots.

    Grumbles

    WTF double post

    The Matrix: Rebooted

    I will wager 100 quatloos that within the next 100 years Harry Potter will be considered a religion.

    jinkies

    voldemort died for your sins

    ginsu

    Sorry about that, let me rephrase what I said.

    Now why would you believe this?

    Paul_Is_Drunk

    Jedi is already a religion in the U.K.

    Deleted_User

    ginsu why do you believe in Jesus? Because someone wrote a book that he is in? Well Harry Potter has Seven full books with his name included in the title of each one!

    Passion of the Christ, one movie with tons of torture, or Four movies(Eventually Seven)of magic and wizardry?

    They are both quite imaginary, but Harry potter seems to be winning, with me at least.

    Phyreblade

    Naw, but you know the Bible, Qu’ran, Book of Mormon, Necronomicon, etc., they got a *few* years on Harry Potter. They’re a classics. And you can’t ignore the classics. They Pwn all…

    Paul_Is_Drunk

    The Iliad is even older, therefore it beats all…

    I, for one, welcome our new Greek gods, and look forward to punching the mailman in the name of Ares before getting wasted with half-man/half-goat creatures.

    This is going to be awesome!

    knogoodidleft

    well, if you wanna get technical, the Egyptians had the book of the dead at like… 3000BC, well before you Iliad :d

    Thus, we must all worship the sun god, and all their other gods.

    But also technically, we don’t know what the hieroglyphics interpret.

    hawk, owl, owl, hawk, monkey, cat, temple, man carrying pot on head, bird

    Could mean anything…

    jmtsb

    okay. personally, i think that everyone has their own opinion and the right to express it, but seriously!!!! what is up with this site always hting on God? you always tell christians to fuck off because they are always in your face about it, aren’t you doing the same?

    The Matrix: Rebooted

    Calm down, jmtsb, its a humor (or cool stuff) site. Making fun of religion/politics/macs etc. is funny. Feel free to submit anti-atheists stuff if you want, just make sure its funny.

    Gaexion

    Because it’s easy and always generates LULz.
    People of faith and women should either conform to the rules of the internet or go back to lolcats or the AOL chatboards if you can’t take it.

    You religious types(kinda like furries now that I think about it) are always like “why do you mock us and make fun of what we love?”.Because it’s fuckign stupid, it doesnt exist, the majority is changing to prove that it doesnt exist and you really need to grow up and get with the program because were tired of you.

    Maybe because if we don’t put you in your place now, the internet will end up like syndicated television, where i can’t legally tell you to fuck off, and because this is the last true uncensored place left on earth and if I want to kick your favorite fairy tale in the dirt and shit all over it i can.I CAN.And you can’t stop me.

    I know it infuriates you to no end that i can openly mock your god and get away with it.I know it bothers you to know that unlike your church meeting groups there is no one to come in and drag me away when i start to get too anti-religious.It pisses you off that the only satisfaction you get is the meager belief that I’ll get whats coming to me in the end.Well shut you mouth until the end of days and we’ll see who’s right.

    Gaexion

    And just to be fair I’ll made sure my descendants give Harry Potterites the exact same treatment.

    I will always be there to put you in your place.I will always be the doubt in the back of your mind as you sit in the back of bible class.I will always be the flaw in the logic presented in the story before you.i will always be the darkness in the world when you scream why would god let this happen.I will always be one voice in the crowd who says “Bollacks!” to whatever makes you able to sleep at night.

    I hope every time you get that good tingly feelign from praying you think of the starving and abused children a world away that god lets die,many of which you could have saved if you hadnt wasted your time praying, and the days you could have used to save a life or help the beleagured that you instead wasted ever sunday.

    I hope the guilt sinks in one day when you realize you care more about soem dead cracker on a cross than you do about the starcing nigras down the steet in the ghetto.I hope that one day you realize how many lives were lsot under the banner of a crusade and that you are as much responsible for it now as theyw ere then.

    I hoep one day you pull your head out of your ass and actually practice what you preach.

    I hope you ironically end up in your hell with your Nambla priests and your disney furfags.

    Phyreblade

    Well dagnabbit Gaexion, how about you quit beating about the bush and tell us how you really feel?

    ROFL 😛

    Gaexion

    i feel better actually.

    Paul_Is_Drunk

    Gaexion

    Thank you. I’m sick of these people going from, “Obey my religion!” to, “Why are you making fun of me?” It’s like dealing with toddlers. If their religion had any logical ground to stand on, simple jokes like this one wouldn’t piss them off so much, because it forces them to consider just how stupid the whole thing is, or instead of dealing with reality reverting to one of the two previous quotes.

    Phyreblade


    LOL I’m glad to hear it.

    BTW:

    I hope the guilt sinks in one day when you realize you care more about some dead cracker on a cross than you do about the starving nigras down the street in the ghetto.

    Fixed. Win. 🙂

    knogoodidleft

    oh, whats that old bumper sticker made internet phrase, something like “god made me an atheist, who are you to question him?” that one still makes me laugh.

    jmtsb

    To Gaexion
    just because i ask you to quit being an existintial moron and to have some human decency, i am all of the sudden a religion fagmuffin? i agree with reboot. i think pretty much everything on this site is funny, even this post! and religion is the downfall of human individuality. i believe in Jesus not because i want you to obey my rules! in fact i think that if there is a hell, the priests, preachers, bishop, and hopefully the pope will get there first for using God and the image of Christ as a gun to make people do whatever they feel like. go ahead turd face and insult my sexuality, my personal beliefs, my political stanza, as you so stereotypically reduced me to, and insult my God. the thing is, he can take a joke!!!!
    as can i. i’m not forcing anything on you, only asking you to do what you stereotype all Christians (even though i hate that word)for not doing. don’t get in my face for not believing what you do. practice what YOU preach!!
    and i personally think that Harry Potter is a wonderful series, and Emma Watson is the greatest thing to come into this world with a vagina since Angelina Jolie.

    brick

    the two most vocal religious groups i can think of are atheists and southern christians.
    existentialism

    RichardAtHome

    jmtsb, you may well be the last surviving real (as in follows the teachings of Christ) Christian on the planet.

    Good for you.

    peace.

    Phyreblade


    I’m sorry, but disagree. Emma Watson has nothing on Angelina Jolie… 😛

    Chenoan

    It’s rather ironic, Christianity rejects magic when Jesus went around performing magic all round. So pretty much, magic is only allowed by jesus and god. That’s more than a little hypocritical.

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