Original Mudkips

original%20mudkipz.thumbnail Original Mudkips wtf Humor

One day on Halloween, I decided to fuck with the major retard at school when I came out of science for break. He was dressed as Ash. Knowing this was going to happen, I brought a Mudkips doll. Thus I started the conversation, making sure no one saw me.

“So I heard you like Mudkips…”

“Mudkips? I LUUUUUUUUUUUURVE MUDKIPS.”

“O RLY? So, would you ever fuck a Mudkips, that is..” (he cuts me off before I could said ‘if you were a Mudkips’) “OF COURSE.”

“Well I just happen to have a Mudkips here, and.”

Before I finished the sentence, which would have resulted in me hitting him across the face with the doll, he grabbed it. In one swift motion his pants were down and he was violently humping it. Not to get between a man and his Mudkips, I started to walk away, because there is no way I’d be caught wrestling a half-naked crazy guy humping a Mudkips.

Needles to say, within 5 to 10 seconds, some girls saw him and started screaming. I coolly walked into a restroom, pretending nothing had ever happened; not that I had intended that outcome, but now that it was in play I didn’t want to be involved.

I came back two minutes later, and like any wanton act on school grounds there was now a huge crowd round him. He was still fucking it and baying this real fucked up ‘EEEEEEEEEEINNNNF EEEEEEEEEEINNNF’ sound. Suddenly a scuffle broke out in the middle, meaning he probably did something stupid.

I asked someone what had happened. A girlfriend of one of the football players tried to get him to stop, but he bit her for trying to take it away. Someone called in a few football players (all dressed up like Road Warrior) who proceeded to pummel the shit out of the guy. Meanwhile the school police were freaking out and having trouble getting in to the situation.

A few minutes later the intruder alarm went off and we were shuffled into classrooms. Over the intercom the principal announced that someone had thrown a flaming plush toy into the library. Uh.. what the hell.

So we were kept there and about 30 minutes later the principal came on again. This time he was saying that whoever was behind the beating should turn themselves in. All of a sudden this woman began yelling “I WILL SUE YOU FOR DAMAGES. YOU LITTLE PUNKS, I’M GONNA SUE…” and it was cut off.

I asked an office later what had happened. Apparently his mother had come to pick him up and threatened to sue for the beating and ‘whatever else happened.’ The school threatened to counter-sue because of lewd conduct, inciting a riot, and starting a fight.

So I ask you: Do you like Mudkips?

[tiki says : please note, I usually hate posting copypasta, but this was a good one. odds are very good that in the future no copypasta will be approved]

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12 Responses to Original Mudkips

  1. At first I was trying to figure out why a retard would be dressed like the guy from Evil Dead. Then I tried to figure out if a mudkip was slang for mudskipper. Finally, I had to google, and found out that Ash and mudkip are just some gay-ass pokemon shit. And then I completely lost interest in the story.

  2. How the hell do you not know what a mudkip is?

  3. I dunno, I was 25 or so when Pokemon appeared in the US. I’d be surprised if anyone over the age of 25 now knows what a mudkip is. Unless you have kids you let watch that shit.

    Oh god, I’m old. When the fuck did that happen?

  4. I had never heard of a mudkip until I saw this.
    I still don’t know what a mudkip is, but I’m confused and aroused.

  5. @Howie Feltersnatch
    I know what you mean man, the other day I tried to pick up an 18 year old, and she was like “fuck off grandpa”.

    And I’m only 27.

  6. I’m 20 and I know what Ash and Mudkips are. Because I have no fucking life. Somebody, please, kill meee

  7. I’m twenty-three and laughed my ass off. I was watching pokemon while skipping school when it wasn’t on fox kids at like 3 pm. Nobody knew what the fuck I was talking about, and then six months later everybody had this fucking game and I was like : WTF!!!??? and then downloaded the rom. Fuck yeah seaking.

  8. @Hepathos
    Hey, If it makes you feel any better, I’m older than you. By a lot. And I know what pokemon are… And who Ash is…

    I’d like to kill myself right now for that fact, among many other things, but my moral code forbids it… LOL…

    You can at least take comfort in the fact that you are realizing early how bad it can get. Save yourself. Please… There’s still time for you… :)

  9. I’ve noticed a trend in the Pokemon characters, at least the three or so I can remember (Charmander, Pikachu, and I suppose this Mudkip thing) where they are named on what sound they make (Pikachu says “pika, pika” and Charmander says “char, char” and I would guess that a mudkip says “kip, kip” or some such nonsense. Not only does that totally go against the traditional classification of species, but it’s also just rediculous, think if we named any real animal like that.

    Also, I’m 24, and vaguely aware what pokeman is/are, due to the prolific commercialization of cartoons, collectible card games, and God knows what else. Thanks assholes, this is certainly information I want taking up valuable neurons, synapses, etc, in my brain.

  10. LOL
    @schulzbrianr
    Wait, did you just try to reconcile pokemon naming convention with real life biological nomenclature?
    ROFL!
    Thank you. Thank you very much. I feel a lot better about myself now… :P

  11. schulzbrianr I can’t believe you’d take it that far. It almost doesn’t sound like your joking, which is scary.

  12. …..I’m afraid to say yes…




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