Cocaine Fairytale


Jack and Jill went up a hill

To snort a little coke

Jack felt horny, so did Jill

But unfortunately Jack can’t

Maintain an erection

no matter how turned on he is.

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    I once had a girlfriend break into my house to seduce me at 5am, only later did I find out it’s because she got horny doing coke with a guy she was cheating on me with and he couldn’t get it up.

    Women. Gah.


    Hey at least you got laid!

    Does coke really make ur dick soft? What a gay drug!


    Cocaine is a surgical anesthetic….so….it makes everything numb…so long as you “take” enough. ….starts with your face and works it’s way down.

    The Matrix: Rebooted

    I used to do quite a bit of coke when I was an undergrad and I’ve never even heard of someone having this problem. Its a local anesthetic, not a general. So it will make your mouth and nose numb, but not other members.


    hehe I’m not saying that your whole body actually gets numb…it just feels that way…. but things start to not work….like your dick.

    I’m no expert… I didn’t inhale.

    The Matrix: Rebooted

    It also increases your heart rate, which helps with getting things up. And a little bit of numbness helps you last longer in the sack. They even sell lube than numbs you for just that reason.
    I’m not suggesting that everyone run out and try cocaine, just don’t believe everything the DARE officer tells you.


    A coke addiction is nature’s way of saying you have too much money. Oh, and the limp dick does happen. Just because it didn’t happen to you the one time you tried it, doesn’t mean it everyone has the same experience.

    ONLY time I’ve ever had ED was with coke… okay and that one time an ex brought me back to her dorm while I was on mushrooms. However, that was probably more that her face kept changing colors than an inability to get it up.


    Addendum: Most of the time, except for long term addicts, you’ll have no problem gettin’ wood.


    Not getting a hard-on isn’t the worse thing that can happen to you. My old roommate had this friend, Gino, who was a rich manager for some oil company at the ripe age of 26. We’d go to parties at his apartment, and he’d annoyingly brag about his expensive TV and stereo system and expensive lines of the *best quality* coke.

    Then one day he started smoking crack, gradually pawned his stuff, and for the next two or three years I saw him every time I went by the homeless shelter, in tattered rags and shit. He’s probably thirty, thirty-one, and he looks like he’s fucking eighty. Last time I was in Calgary, I ran into him on the street and he told me that he was going up north to run one of the oil-rigs. Judging from his smell and lengthy neck-beard and crack-head eyes, probably not.

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